I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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