Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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