Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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