Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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