Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize