Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
