My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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