Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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