she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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