I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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