Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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