So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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