Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
