it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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