He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
