every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
