love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
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