That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
