just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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