He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
