yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
