3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I wanna bring you to show and tell
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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