I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
