you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
