i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
