I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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