I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
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