i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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