Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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