She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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