definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
