you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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