i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize