U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
His hands were made for my vagina.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
