Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
