Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
