you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
