Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
