You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
