I wanna passion pit in your ass
the condom got lost in my hair
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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