yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
