Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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