your room smells of hookers.
And success
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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