Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
