you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize