Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
And my parents said I crawled through the house
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Randomize
