how can u be prego again
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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