Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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