Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
