There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize
