I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
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